Why More and More Couples are Joining Bisexual Dating Sites?

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“John, I’m only dancing.

She turns me on, but I’m only dancing.

She turns me on, don’t get me wrong.”

These are the lyrics of the song, “John, I’m Only Dancing” by David Bowie. This song was probably the pinnacle of the time Bowie was most blatantly bisexual. In the song, Bowie is singing from the perspective of a man in a gay relationship being turned on by a woman.


So, just what is bisexuality, anyway?

Bisexuality is when someone is both sexually and emotionally attracted to people of either sex. Despite what many people think, they are not confused. Well, not any more than the rest of us. It is more about a person’s sexual identity, which may or may not align with the person’s identity.

Who we are attracted to has little to do with who we are. It is not defined by what kind of sexual experiences a person has had. They might even be completely kiss-less virgins. As sexual identity is fluid and develops through time, these people are somewhat more prone to become homosexuals according to some studies.

On the Kinsey scale that determines sexuality of people through their sexual experiences, bisexuals fall at 2-4. A 0 is completely heterosexual and a 6 is completely homosexual. It varies from culture to culture and is very prevalent in cultures like the Sambia of New Guinea.

The current generation is going through nothing short of a modern sexual revolution. Gender fluidity is a hot topic. Gender identity has become a loose concept and so many new terms have invaded our vocabulary. In fact, today there are more options to fill on forms regarding sexuality. Plus, these days you’ll find a lot many couples on bisexual dating sites. These increasing numbers are a sign of the changing times.

The reason?

The main reason behind this is nothing more than the growing awareness about the phenomenon. According to the findings of a survey as part of the CDC’s National Survey of Family Growth conducted between 2011 and 2013 which involved 9000 Americans, 1.3% of women and 1.9 % men admitted to being homosexual. These numbers do not show any significant increase from the survey conducted in 2010.

The facts that did stand out were the increase in number of bisexuals. The number of women who admitted to having had sexual experiences with other women went up to 17.4% from 14.2%. A similar trend was visible in men too. Another trend visible through the survey was that more women are willing to be labeled as bisexuals than lesbians. Moreover 12.6% of women and 2.8% of men who were heterosexuals also admitted to having had same sex encounters. Similar trends have been seen in the UK, where bisexuals are set to outnumber gays.

People have become more accepting of others sexual orientation

bisexuality datingEveryday more and more stigma related to bisexuals is being eradicated. The movement for the rights of LGBTQ people has now been going on for around a decade and the results and repercussions are here for all to see and experience. There has been a shift in people’s attitudes that surpasses generational gaps. Younger generations are obviously more tolerant than older generations.  Everyone who is an adult, despite whatever generation they belong to now, feel that they should be more inclusive of gender fluidity.

The ease of finding bisexuals on dating sites

  • It is easier to find bisexual partners on an online dating website than anywhere else. It is cheaper, less time consuming, safer and more intuitive. It is also associated with lesser stigma. Plus, a bisexual dating site offers the chance to interact with like-minded people in an environment free of judgement. It gives them a community that they can freely belong to.
  • The University of Essex would like us to believe that there is no such thing as a completely heterosexual woman. Their study claims that while a lesbian woman only gets aroused from sexually suggestive images of only women, a heterosexual woman gets aroused from both hetero and homosexual sexual imagery. If they are to be believed, it gives us another reason behind the rise in number of people on sites like Bicupid. According to them any woman could easily engage in bisexual experimentation and satiate their inherent bi-curiosity.
  • People who are looking for a new and more creative sexual experiences also find it easier to engage other bisexuals into their fantasies. Couples looking for threesomes and even swingers may find themselves on a bisexual dating site to try and get a bisexual to join them. Most dating sites are not openly averse to such couples. It doesn’t exactly hamper their business and brings in more people by opening a niche that most people are too ashamed to talk about. Practices like threesomes and swinging are also less taboo than they once were.
  • People are more willing if not eager to show their unconventional sexual orientation. They are more likely to respond to surveys truthfully and expose their sexual orientation. Individualism has also risen among millennials, which makes people more oriented towards what they want instead of what the society wants from them.
  • Bisexual sites also tend to keep a tight hold over the sensitive information of their clients. Cases of data theft do happen from time to time and on big scales too. But like the risk associated with air travel, most of us do not worry about it. And, it tends to be safer and more fruitful than going to any bar.

Bisexuals are still a rare breed, though and there are many misconceptions about them. Can they hold on to relationships like others? Are they really just gays not yet out of the closet? Are they more likely to cheat? Are they capable of love?  Does bisexuality actually even exist? As more and more of them come out, these myths are dispelled and they gain larger acceptance from the society. There are hundreds, if not thousands of blogs and bisexual websites that are educating people about this group of people. So, while some of us may be jealous of them, while others may be find them more intriguing, the truth is that they are here to stay.