Key Bisexual Dating Rules to Consider
If poly relationships are your thing and you’re straight seeking to date a bisexual, there are certainly some things you want to consider before moving forward. The dating world can be tricky whether you’re straight, bisexual, homosexual, trans, and more. There are things you should do, things you shouldn’t do, and things you should know ahead of time.
There are plenty of couples out there that are into polyamory relationships. The couple that is involved may have one person who is bisexual, or both of them may be bisexual. If you are interested in bisexual dating, read this short guide before getting out there.
Get the truth
First, it will be important that you find a bisexual person whose partner knows that they’re bisexual and is completely fine with them dating another person. Be aware that there will be some people who will mislead you and tell you that their partner is fine if they date other people, but the reality is that it’s a lie. They do their best to cover it up and never have you actually meet their partner. Be leery of anyone who encourages you to stay secret and tries to keep you from ever meeting his or her partner. Honesty is important in any kind of relationship.
Another thing to consider if you want to date a bisexual person is to avoid comparing yourself to his or her partner. The sex will be different between you and that person and that person and his or her partner. It’s not necessarily who is better and not a right or wrong issue. There are some things that bisexual people like more than others, whether it be with a man or a woman. Do your best not to compare yourself and never ask your partner who they like to be with more. That’s not a fair question to them. Chances are they like being with both a man and a woman, and may have particular preferences, but they’re probably not going around doing a comparison. Don’t let your ego get the best of you.
If any of you are having struggles, address them quickly. If you ignore elephants in the room, it will come back to bite you later. As in any relationship, there may be concerns or issues that arise. It’s alright to address them honestly and compassionately. If you find there is a lot of drama going on in the relationship, spend some time discussing it. If it cannot be resolved, consider reaching out for professional help. Poly relationships can have a bit more struggles involved and monogamous relationships, so be on it when you see something arise that concerns you.
Be sure you and the others involved set boundaries when it comes to the bisexual relationship. What are the rules? Are there any? You don’t have to be rigid, but talk about clear boundaries, expectations, and rules. At the same time, state what deal breakers are, as well as consequences. Everyone has a voice and taking each person’s wants and needs into consideration is fair to all.
Know that your time will be limited
If you’re in a bisexual relationship, understand that your time will be limited with that person. Most of the time, the bisexual person will hang out with the partner and perhaps even live there in the same home. You may be tempted to think that over time you’ll be able to win that person over and maybe that person will want to come be with you full time. The reality is that they’re probably not looking to leave their current partner. They simply enjoy being with both a man and a woman, but their security and commitment is usually with their current partner. Accept the fact that your time may be limited.
Know that the bisexual may change their mind
As in any relationship, the bisexual person that you’re dating may change his or her mind. Maybe he thought he was interested in having another relationship outside of his current one, but has since changed his mind and strictly wants to stay monogamous. This is something that does happen regularly, so keep in mind that long term may not be an option. Sit down and have a real heart-to-heart with this person to see what their intentions are. Ask them if this is something they’ve done before and if this is something that they feel is long-term or if it’s just something they’re trying out. If you’re alright with them changing their mind, then move forward with the pursuit. But if you’re looking for long-term and you want security in that and they’re not sure, then you might want to pass and keep looking.
Your wants and needs matter
Regardless of whether you’re dating a straight or bisexual person, know that what you want and need matter. Just because you’re the one on the outside of this bisexual relationship coming in does not mean that what you want doesn’t matter. You’re worthy to have what you want in a relationship. If one or both of the couple makes you feel like you’re just the outsider and what you want isn’t important, have a conversation about this with them. If they do not take into consideration how you feel, then you may want to stop pursuing this person. Do not be afraid to voice your desires, your wishes, your boundaries, and your struggles with the bisexual and his or her partner if necessary.
Bisexual dating can be quite fulfilling, just like any other dating scenario. Keep in mind these rules and considerations as you move forward in your dating venture. The more you learn about polyamory relationships, the better off you will be. They can get a little tricky here or there, but as you navigate them with insight and understanding, your chances of having a successful and healthy bisexual relationship are great!